


Not Dating for Dummies

by Generichippo



Category: Naruto
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-30
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2020-11-08 05:55:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20830490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Generichippo/pseuds/Generichippo
Summary: Some friendships are special. Take Naruto and Sasuke's for example. They spend all their free time together, go on fake dates, cuddle, and yet they're still just friends. Or are they?





	Not Dating for Dummies

Naruto smiled nervously as he walked into his dorm room for the very first time. He had his back pack and a rolling suitcase and nothing else as he stepped out of the bustling hall and into what would be his new home.

It was a typical dorm room; white walls, grey carpet, two twin beds. The bed by the window already had sheets and a blanket on it, making Naruto realize the first things he forgot, and then he noticed the boy sitting at the desk in front of his laptop. He was lean, but muscular, and as tall as Naruto as he rose to his feet. His black hair was styled just so, and his almost black eyes took in Naruto with clear precision. He was wearing dark jeans and a plain black hoodie. Naruto had to consciously draw his gaze away from his new roommates face. His nose was straight and narrow, with perfectly clear pale skin, and a sharp jaw and cheekbones.

"Hi! I'm Naruto Uzumaki. Guess we're roommates now." Naruto stuck out his hand and his new roomie reached out his own long fingered appendage and shook. He had musicians hands.

"Sasuke Uchiha."

"Nice to meet you." Naruto noticed belatedly that both of them had held the handshake for too long and they released at the same moment.

Sasuke nodded and retook his seat while Naruto puttered around and set up his very few belongings. He put his laptop on his own desk as well as the charger for it and one for his phone. He unpacked his clothes next, tossing them haphazardly in his drawers, and then he sat on his bed and turned to look at Sasuke who quickly looked away.

"Um, so where are you from?"

"Tokyo, you?"

"Woah! That's far! I'm from California."

"Also far." Sasuke pointed out with a small smirk.

"Rude much." Naruto smiled, "What program are you in?"

"Med-sci. You?"

"Politics. I want to be a lawyer. Fight for the little guy, right?"

"Hn."

"Do you have any hobbies?"

"Reading. You?"

"Running." Naruto tilted his head, "Do you work out? You're totally ripped."

Sasuke scoffed, "I keep in shape. Maybe I'll join you on your runs, if you can keep up that is."

"You're so on! I'll run you till I have to carry you back!"

"You can try."

Their eyes locked, both of them fighting down smiles. Naruto looked away first and forced himself to calm down before he ended up making a fool of himself in front of his new roomie.

"Do you wanna find the cafeteria with me?" Naruto asked, realizing he hadn't eaten in hours.

"Sure." Sasuke stood and Naruto's eyes followed the fluid movement as he slid on his shoes before turning to glance at Naruto, "Are you coming?"

"Uh, yeah." Naruto blushed, berating himself as he leapt from the bed and shoved his feet into his ratty old runners. He tripped on his suitcase in his rush and would have crashed right into the door if Sasuke hadn't reached out and caught him.

"Eep!" Naruto grabbed Sasuke's arm as he caught his balance and they both stared at each other. Naruto could feel his tanned skin heating with a blush and he noticed that the Uchiha's pale cheeks were also lightly coloured. It made Naruto think of all the ways he could get the man to blush just to see that adorable expression again.

"Clumsy." Sasuke spoke softly and then released Naruto's shoulders. The blonde let go of his arm and smiled brightly.

"Thanks for catching me."

"I get the feeling it won't be the last time."

They headed down the hall, still talking like old friends, neither one mentioned the moment in the doorway.

They didn't have any classes together but the two of them still managed to make their friendship work. They'd study together during breaks, and eat meals together whenever they could. They'd spend hours in their room teasing and joking while doing work for their classes.

The first hurdle in their friendship was Sasuke's fan-club. Sasuke was hot, like, really hot. He had that brooding expression, he wore a lot of dark clothing, and pretty much embodied the idea of tall dark and handsome. And that drew a crowd. Despite his aversion to conversation, people would plop themselves down next to him, sometimes in his personal space, and just... talk. Sasuke ignored them for the most part. Sometimes he left them there, still talking to themselves. But then, something happened that was unforgivable.

Sasuke was waiting for Naruto in one of the cafs on campus and he saw the blond across the room. He rolled his eyes when Naruto stuck his tongue out and moved his bag from the seat next to him so the blonde would have somewhere to sit. Little did he know that Karin was waiting to pounce. Almost as soon as the bag was moved she was there, flirting and giggling, and trying to touch Sasuke at every turn. He had had enough.

"Leave."

They kept chattering.

"I SAID LEAVE!" The young women and a few men at the table gaped at him. Then they all scrambled to grab their things and get out of the Uchiha's range of throwing things.

Sasuke spun and saw a shocked Naruto behind him, "You can stay, I guess."

Naruto laughed and sat down in the seat Sasuke had attempted to save for him, "My fucking hero. Jeez, they wouldn't have run if they knew what a teddy bear you were inside." He knocked their shoulders together and Sasuke swatted him off. The fan-club returned, but they never took Naruto's spot again. They'd learned their lesson.

The second problem in their relationship was Naruto's social life. He'd beg Sasuke to come meet his other friends and the Uchiha always said no. They grumbled back and forth about it for weeks until Naruto managed to talk Sasuke into coming by claiming it would be Sasuke's belated birthday gift to him even though they hadn't known each other when Naruto's birthday happened. They bickered the entire time they got ready and all the way to where they'd agreed to meet the rest of Naruto's friends. Naruto made a comment just as they joined the huddle of their friends and he grinned as he greeted everyone but something was wrong. They headed to the restaurant and Naruto found he wasn't having as much fun as he thought he would. Sasuke knew Neji from his program so they were speaking just out of earshot and it was driving Naruto crazy. Not even Kiba's dirty jokes could distract him completely from the fact that Sasuke and Neji were off in their own world.

In the restaurant, Naruto managed to weasle his way behind Sasuke and when the other man tried to go down the table, Naruto caught the bottom of his sleeve. Sasuke paused and then turned to look at Naruto questioningly. The blonde man offered a small smile that made Sasuke grin. The two of them took the chairs closest to them and sat down next to each other. Neji sat on Sasuke's other side, but now Naruto could join in their conversation. Now he could tease Sasuke and bring out the clever, wicked-smart guy he'd been telling his friends about.

The rest of the evening was a blast. Naruto and Sasuke stuck together as they headed to the bowling alley and Naruto's friends welcomed him into their group easily. He calmed Naruto's crazy energy and had his own sarcastic humour that cracked up the less crude boys in the group. 

Back at the school they all broke off into their separate dorms and then again into their individual rooms. Sasuke and Naruto were quiet as they took off their jackets and shoes and then they stole glances at each other. Naruto spoke first.

"... I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be."

"No but I was-"

"I-I didn't mind." Sasuke looked away from Naruto's surprised expression. They'd known each other for a few months and were still dancing around the topic.

"Oh." Naruto smiled and moved towards his dresser, "Um, good. That's- really good."

Sasuke grabbed his pyjamas and escaped to the bathroom before he did something stupid. Both he and Naruto fell asleep with smiles on their faces that night.

Their school year continued on as usual. Naruto's friends slowly became Naruto and Sasuke's friends, they worked hard but still managed to go out once in awhile, and they went on dates. Well... hypothetical dates.

It started when Naruto was lazing about on Saturday morning. He was up early to go to the gym and Sasuke was doing homework when he got back.

"Hey, Sasuke, do you know any good places to take girls for dates around here?"

Sasuke snorted, saving his work, "How the hell would I know?"

"Wanna come find some good ones with me? It's like research for when we get girls." The completely nonchalant way Naruto spoke didn't betray the strange nervous feeling he had in his gut.

The Uchiha tapped his fingers on his desk, hesitating only for a moment, "Research is always better. Let's go." And so their 'date research' began.

They went to a quaint restaurant downtown the first time. It was almost like going out with a friend except they added more elements such as flirting, touching, and very thin reasoning as to why they should practice with each other.

Naruto shifted and his foot brushed Sasuke's under the table.

"Oh sorry."

"No. Uh, I mean. If this was a date and I was a girl, you could just play it off." Sasuke suggested, keeping his leg where it was, pressed against Naruto's.

They both looked away and then Naruto started talking about his favourite class again. They ordered food and then shared dessert, both of them blushing and loudly denying their actions being anything other than platonic. They split the bill and then took the bus back to campus. Neither one of them mentioned it to any of their friends. And so it continued.

Naruto's friends had their own thoughts of his and Sasuke's no-homo relationship. Most of them had entered a pool into how long it would take for the two of them to admit they're dating. But a few of them missed the memo, Kiba in particular.

They were all talking about housing for next year and Sasuke and Naruto had found a 3-bedroom. Shikamaru and Neji exchanged glances, keeping their hands very much in the downward position. Shino didn't move either and Choji avoided eye contact. No one wanted to live in a house with that much sexual tension when it wasn't their own.

"Yeah for sure!" Kiba cried, grinning.

They chatted about the house, texted the landlord that they were available to see it tomorrow, and then Sasuke and Naruto headed to class.

Shino turned to Kiba, "You're an idiot."

"Am not!" He paused, "Why though?"

Neji snorted, "Those two are totally going to start dating."

"No way! They're bros, like me and Shino."

The bug lover shook his head, "No. We're bros as you say because we are friends and hold no romantic interest for each other. The same cannot be said for them."

Kiba rolled his eyes, "Fuck off you guys. I'm right. Leave it at that."

It was months later when Kiba arrived at the house with him mom, sister, and all of his belongings that he remembered what his other friends had said about his new roommates. He only thought of it when Naruto walked out of Sasuke's room wearing the Uchiha's pants. He didn't really think anything of it in the moment, but a few weeks later he remembered.

It wasn't the big things that gave Kiba pause, it was the little ones. When he came home and found the pair of them sitting on the couch with their feet touching on the table when they really didn't have to be. Or when they had a long bout of eye contact that wasn't about silently communicating. Or when he asked of either of them wanted to go on a double date with him and both of their excuses were flimsy while they traded looks back and forth.

Kiba generally ignored their drama though. They weren't touchy and most of their flirting counted as insults so it wasn't too bad. He really didn't think he had any problems with it. Then Naruto started talking to him and Kiba realized he was far more invested in their bullshit than he thought.

"I think I might agree to that date Sakura wants to set me up on."

Kiba choked on his energy drink. He was so glad that Sasuke was in class.

"Why?"

Naruto shrugged, "She says the girl is really sweet. And... I feel like I'm not putting myself out there."

"No."

"What? Why not?"

"Because you can't. What about Sasuke?"

"What about him?"

"You're blindsiding him. You can't go on this date."

"Kiba, dude, come on."

Kiba sent him a withering look, "If you go on that date, I will never speak to you again." He went to his room after that and immediately texted Shino.

Dude im too invested in naruto and sasukes fake love life

Shino answered immediately.

We warned you. Moron.

Kiba sighed. He had to admit he was right. Now he just had to live with it.

Naruto never did go on that date.

It was only a few weeks later when Kiba was eating fruit loops for dinner and Naruto was making his ramen that his silent approval found its voice. Sasuke came home from class and poked his head in to see what they were up to.

Kiba said hello through a mouthful of sugary cereal and Naruto held out a hand. The brunette watched in silence as Naruto hummed a little tune and spun himself and Sasuke around the kitchen in an impromptu waltz.

"Moron, what are you doing?" Sasuke muttered as he allowed himself to be twirled.

"Nothing, you?" Naruto replied with a grin.

Sasuke shook his head, poked Naruto in the chest and then went to put his things in his room. Kiba stared as Naruto went back to cooking as if nothing had happened.

"I'm going to be the officiant. And the best man." He said aloud, mostly to himself.

"What did you say?" Naruto asked, glancing over.

Kiba smirked, "Nothing, just future plans." Naruto had always been the prankster of the group, but Kiba had been his best friend for a long time and had picked up a few things.

He waited two weeks before implementing his plan. He had come up with a genius plan, in his mind anyway, and was going to make sure it went perfectly. He checked his jitters at the door and then walked in as he normally did. Naruto and Sasuke were sitting on the couch, Naruto's arm over the back of it where Sasuke was sitting closer then necessary, and Kiba walked up beside the couch.

"Hey." He greeted before leaning down and pecking first Naruto and then Sasuke on the lips, "What are you watching?"

"Dude!"

"What the hell!" Both Naruto and Sasuke shouted, Naruto making a show of wiping his mouth to get rid of the bro cooties.

"What? Ino said it was a good way to greet people, they do it all the time in Europe. You guys should try it?"

"What, kissing? I've done it, thanks." Naruto stuck his tongue out.

"No, dip shit, using it as a greeting. Like to say hey and bye." Kiba had trained for this and just managed to keep a serious expression until he made it to the kitchen where he hid behind the partition and giggled like a school girl.

Naruto looked at Sasuke, "It's weird... right?"

"Of course." The Uchiha replied, "But we've always been a little weird." He leaned over and kissed Naruto's lips for only a second before pulling away, "Night, loser."

"Night." Naruto whispered, trying and failing not to blush.

That was how their kissing began, as a simple greeting. Kiba implemented the next stage in his plan a week after making sure to keep up the habit. For him, he saw it as necessity, the same as shaving every morning, but he knew that the kisses his roommates shared lasted a lot longer then his tiny pecks.

"You know, you could probably even use kissing as a way to express yourself." He muttered over coffee as he and Naruto ate breakfast before class.

The blond looked up sharply, "What do you mean?"

"Like, take it a step further than the stuck up Europeans, why not kiss to show excitement, or sadness? Add some more passion. You should run it by Sasuke."

"Why not you?"

Kiba didn't panic, he had asked Shikamaru for advice on this part, "Because I'm expressive enough that you don't have to. The Uchiha though, you should try it, see if it helps him express himself."

Naruto looked suspicious but nodded, "As an experiment, right?"

"There's no harm in trying to help a friend." Kiba told him sagely.

Poor Sasuke didn't know what was coming. He was in his room one night when Naruto returned the next day after a particularly shitty lab. He was angry at himself and his groupmates and just wanted to rant. As he knocked on Sasuke's bedroom door he remembered Kiba's advice. As soon as Sasuke opened the door, messy hair, reading glasses on the top of his head, an old shirt and sweatpants, Naruto grabbed his face and kissed him like he meant it. He kissed him hard, until his lips felt bruised. He swiped his tongue along the Uchiha's stunned mouth and then started to release him, worried he'd gone to far.

Sasuke though, moved without thinking. His arms came up, latching onto Naruto's hips, and and opened his mouth wider, inviting the blond to explore. They stood their in his doorway making out for a long time until finally Naruto pulled back, panting and licked his swollen lips.

"Uh, hey, I had a really shitty lab."

Sasuke stepped back clearing his throat, "I see."

"Kiba said that we could use kissing to show other emotions than saying hey and bye. So..."

"Right. Makes sense."

"But like- only with you, 'cause you're an emotionally repressed bastard."

Sasuke narrowed his eyes, "... Hn."

"Well anyway," Naruto rocked back on his heels and then leaned forward again and captured Sasuke's plump bottom lip in a soft kiss, "See you." He turned and disappeared down the hall to his own room.

Sasuke stared after him in a daze before shaking his head to clear it. He had questions, and he knew just who to ask.

Kiba held up his hands as soon as he saw Sasuke's expression when he burst into his room. The Uchiha quietly closed the door behind him and then crossed his arms and leaned back against the wood.

"I'm not gay." He told his messy haired roommate.

Kiba bit his lip, "Right-o."

"I'm not."

"Not even a little?" Kiba smiled innocently, "Ino said it's a spectrum, you know. Sexuality."

"Ino doesn't know shit!" Sasuke hissed. Kiba sucked his lips in to keep from pointing out that Ino was a full fledged lesbian who prided herself on keeping up with all LGBTQ+ information.

Sasuke pointed at Kiba, "I don't know what you told Naruto, but I'm not gay. Also, don't kiss him!" The blacked haired man turned and stormed out of Kiba's room allowing the dog lover to let out the breath he'd been holding and giggle hysterically.

It was three weeks later when Sasuke had Naruto pinned against the wall of one of Shino's cupboards that he remembered the conversation he had with Kiba. As he ran a hand over Naruto's abs and shoved his tongue practically down the blond's throat under the guise that he was pissed he got dragged to this party on a Thursday, he had to admit that maybe that spectrum wasn't so wrong. Maybe, as he felt Naruto smile against his neck as he rubbed his thigh against the blond's crotch, part of this was fun and arousing, and pretty damn gay.

Naruto himself had figured that part out. The part he hadn't yet figured out was how to explain to Sasuke that he found their kissing to show emotion fulfilling but wanted more. Luckily enough, the third part of Kiba's plan went into effect that night.

As they returned from the broom closet after tidying themselves up, Kiba started speaking, "You know, I've been feeling stressed lately. Do you guys know any good stress relief?"

Shikamaru looked seriously at his friend as the two missing members of their group retook their seats, "Sex always helps."

Ino wrinkled her nose up on cue, "But sex without feelings can make you more stressed if you fall for the person."

"Sex with a friend is better. Especially if you keep the option of dating open." Sakura said sagely, hiding her smile by taking a sip of her sangria.

Kiba turned to Naruto, "What do you think? Think sex with a friend with keeping some strings could help relieve stress?"

"What, um, yeah. Yeah, I think it could." He said, studying his shoes. Sasuke looked around the room at their friends shitty poker faces and knew he had lost.

"I agree." He admitted.

"Really?" Naruto asked, his head snapping up.

The Uchiha glared at Kiba, "Yes." He said, answering the blond. The topic changed after that but Kiba tipped his beer towards his pissed off roommate. Sasuke gave him the finger in return. Sure, his blood was humming at the thought of having a romp in the sheets with Naruto, but he didn't enjoy being played, especially by an idiot like Kiba.

Later that night, when everyone was sufficiently drunk, Sasuke found himself standing in Shino's backyard watching Kiba and Naruto wrestle over a bag of Twizzlers with Shikamaru. As he watched the blond laugh and tackle their roommate to the ground before being tossed off and leapt on, Sasuke realized he had an actual smile on his face. He realized that despite the fact that he found their entire argument and wrestling match illogical and stupid he was looking forward to the inevitable end when Naruto would come and bring him a twizzler as either a sign of his victory or a consolation prize.

"I'm in love with him, aren't I?" He muttered, mostly to himself.

Shikamaru smirked, blowing his cigarette smoke out of the side of his mouth, "Took you long enough." He replied before walking over to the fire pit where Sakura was adding more logs. Sasuke was left leaning against the house with burning cheeks and the irrational urge to run up to his blond friend and confess his undying love.

The urge didn't leave for some time. Sasuke was stuck in a limbo of make out sessions with the oblivious blond that were slowly but surely moving closer and closer to a bedroom.

Sasuke came home a month after his revelation and found Naruto and Kiba arguing in whispers in the kitchen.

"What's wrong?" He asked. Both men jumped, not having heard him come in.

"Nothing! Nothing's wrong. Right Kiba?" Naruto elbowed the brunette and Kiba winced rubbing his side.

"No. We just had a question for you, Sasuke, to help our argument."

Sasuke crossed his arms, waiting.

"If you were in a unconfirmed relationship, would it be better to confess your feelings, or hide them?" Kiba continued.

"God fucking dammit Naruto!" Sasuke shouted, stomping over to the blond and kissing him right on the lips, "I love you, you absolute fucking moron."

"Wha-" Naruto was interrupted by another kiss and then he put his hands on Sasuke's chest and held him at bay, "Really?"

"Yes, really." Sasuke rolled his eyes and wrapped his arms loosely around Naruto's back, "Who the fuck else would I fall in love with?"

Naruto beamed and then leaned in and pecked Sasuke's nose, "I love you too, dickwad."

Kiba grinned at his friends and slowly started backing towards the exit of the kitchen. Sasuke released one of his arms though and spun to glare at him, "We would have figured it out."

The brown haired man snorted, "You literally waltzed across the kitchen and thought you were just friends. You guys went on a romantic cruise for two weeks and said it meant nothing. You tied his tie for him and held his hand when you went to the movies every week! You would not have figured it out."

Naruto laughed, "Whatever, dog breath. Thanks."

Kiba grinned, "I'm going to officiate your wedding. And I'm calling the spot as your best man."

"Deal!"

Sasuke sighed, "Fine. But then we're even."

Kiba shrugged, putting his hands in his pockets, "I'm moving out next month, no way am I sticking it out through your honeymoon stage."

Sasuke and Naruto blushed at that and they heard Kiba's howling laughter as he disappeared into his room. In the next month, they really didn't blame him for leaving. They were in love, and they were finally dating for real. Kiba's work there was done, not as a friend, but as a roommate at least.


End file.
